BeCOMing a Proverbs 31 woman
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One of the hardest realities to face is that I fail at being the Proverbs 31 woman. Ashamedly, the last year had too many indiscretions to number. The events of life left me bitter, cold, vengeful and nasty - and I've been many years with the Lord cleansing these things, but a stench remains. Once I found God, some of that bitterness was redirected as I became a legalist and I masked the anger and aggression behind my knowledge of the bible. The gentle, tender, meek, kind and ladylike behavior of the bible escaped by critical eye, as I looked around the glaring log in my eye to focus on the spec in my brother's. But today, the Lord has shown me the work I must do.
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The Lord has been so gracious to patiently love and forgive me - and I am ever so grateful. Many people have come and gone in my life, for who could bear such a unhealthy abusive tempered person. The Lord promised to never leave nor forsake me, which means that He will never walk out and He will never emotionally abandon me. This is true love, when you can fully know someone, good and bad, and still love them. When you encourage their strengths and help them recognize and eliminate the bad. Jesus has done this for me, and continues to do so; He has preserved and strengthened our relationship - with His unending love and acceptance. The discipline, the corrections, are hard but manageable because He is always right there with me - leading with a manifest presence. I can only hope and pray and ask the Lord to renew my spirit and give me a heart and mind like His in my interpersonal relationships. I haven't wanted to be an abusive person, I just did not know how to deal with my emotions and anger which is buried deep inside. As the Lord continues to reveal some of my issues - corrupt files as I call them, I denounced and revoked the enemies assignments and decrees over me by the blood of the lamb. I confessed my sin and I asked my Lord to forgive and heal me so that I can walk in victory in this area.
I have to take responsibility for being a godly woman, at all times - in all circumstances. Sure no one is perfect, but I shouldn't respond the same as non-christians in difficult situations. There should be something different about me, a pleasing aroma about the way I conducted myself, instead of a stench which revolts people. I need to begin to focus on the log in my own eye and remove it. I need to become a godly, wholesome woman.
What is it be a Proverbs 31 Woman? This woman is defined as the ideal wife. The spirit, the heart and mind, of this refined lady is defined in other passages, as well. Even though she is a wife, we single ladies can glee from her wisdom and noble character with a gentle and quite spirit. The key to this type of spirit is that it is pleasing in the sight of the LORD. When the Israelites left Egypt, God established statues, and if the people did as He instructed they would be found to 'right' in His eyes. If they were found to have favor in His eyes, they would continue to have His manifest presence leading them and they would receive His promised blessing of gaining the promised land with all its abundance and provision. The key to life is to be pleasing in the eyes of our Lord, regardless of the how hard it is to face your own demons and how humble you become in the process. Remember, our Lord who is above all things, once humbled Himself to become the least as a lowly man.
SCRIPTURES ON BEING A SUITABLE WIFE (WOMAN)
- Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, His body, and is Himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. (Ephesians 5:22-24).
- Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quite spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. (1 Peter 3:1-6).
- Wives submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. (Colossians 3:18).
- Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God. (Titus 2:3-5).
- A wife of noble character is her husband's crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones (Proverbs 12:4).
- He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD (Proverbs 18:22).
- A quarrelsome wife is like the constant dripping of a leaky roof (Proverbs 19:13b).
- A prudent wife is from the LORD (Proverbs 19:14b).
- Better to live in a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife (Proverbs 21:9; 25:24).
- Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and nagging wife (Proverbs 21:19).
- A wayward wife is a narrow well (Proverbs 23:27).
- A quarrelsome wife is like the dripping of a leaky roof in a rainstorm (Proverbs 27:15).
- A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants. She considers a field and buys it; out of her earning she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. She seems that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers. She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple. Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the leaders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes. She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: 'Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.' Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praises at the city gate. (Proverbs 31:10:31).
ADMIRABLE QUALITIES
We see terms like noble character and prudent in defining her. Noble means having or showing fine personal qualities or high moral principles and ideals or a person of rank in birth. Prudent is... Similar words are:
Jesus came to redeem mankind for good works. We see Paul say, (Jesus) who gave Himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are His very own, eager to do what is good. (Titus 2:14). Therefore if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: the old has gone, the new is here! All this is from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to Himself in Christ, not counting people's sins against them. (2 Corinthians 5:17).
- Honest - free of deceit and untruthfulness, sincere, morally correct or virtuous, blameless, well-intentioned
- Meek - gentle, subdued, humble, enduring, gentle, mild, patient,
- Kind - good nature or disposition; benevolent, willing to help others; being friendly, generous and considerate; and being considerate and helpful
- Tender - showing kindness, gentleness, concern, sympathy, empathy
- Affirming - to encourage, support or praise; to show appreciation, affection or favor
- Pure - honest and trustworthy intentions, does good deed from generosity not from seeking merit or status
- Considerate - careful not to cause inconvenience or hurt to others, kind
- Dignified - the quality of being worthy of honor or respect, demonstrating self-esteem or self-respect
- Upstanding - honest, respectable, strictly honorable, upright
- Self-sacrificing - giving up one's own interests or wishes in order to help others or advance a cause
- Proper - suitable, right, fitting, reserved, becoming or appropriate
- Delightful - causing delight (great pleasure) or charm, lovely, satisfying, congenial, genteel
- Likable - pleasant, demure, friendly and easy to like
- Tempered - to act as a neutralizing or counterbalancing force to others
- Courteous - polite, respectful, or considerate in manner
- Respectful - a feeling of deep admiration for another about their abilities, qualities or achievements
- Polite - having or showing behavior that is respectful and considerate of other people, well-mannered
- Honorable - being or worthy of honor: high respect, great esteem
- Courteous - polite, respectful or considerate in manner, marked by polished manners, civilized, or civil
- Thoughtful - showing careful consideration or attention for the needs of other people
- Soft-spoken - speaking well, pleasingly, fittingly in a polite correct way, or having a gentle or quiet voice
- Well-behaved - conducting oneself in an appropriate or good manner
- Lady-like - refined, a courteous and gentle woman with elegance and grace, showing proper and dignified behavior, charming with a sense of respect, quite and comforting demeanor, well-bred or of noble birth
- Charming - pleasant, polite, friendly and likable, personable, pleasing, winsome, warm, delightful
- Trustworthy - projecting honesty, confidence, comfort and security for others
- Good manners - being friendly, polite and respectful; allowing others to voice opinion without an argument or forcing your position; speak encouragingly and uplifting; avoiding gossip or ridicule, and avoiding harsh or condemning comments or behaviors which cause others to be offended or hurt
- Self-respecting - possessing knowledge of intrinsic value enough to live with integrity and honor
- Self- esteem - confidence in one's ability or worth
- Righteous - a person or conduct morally right or justifiable; virtuous
- Virtuous - having or showing high moral standards
- Moral - concerned with the principles of right and wrong behavior and human character
Jesus came to redeem mankind for good works. We see Paul say, (Jesus) who gave Himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are His very own, eager to do what is good. (Titus 2:14). Therefore if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: the old has gone, the new is here! All this is from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to Himself in Christ, not counting people's sins against them. (2 Corinthians 5:17).